I recommend being as welcoming and friendly to adults as you are to kids. Invite them to dinner and whatever activities you like doing. Be honest about your opinions as they come up in a respectful manner and be willing to listen to and address people's questions and concerns. Tell them what you know about the distinction between pedophiles and sexual abusers and tell them what you believe about age of consent and child sexuality and why. Most adults will probably disagree with you but if you are friendly and open so they've gotten to know you and like you, most will see that you are genuine in your good intentions and will simply agree to disagree for the sake of your friendship. Yes, some might get upset and cut you off or even try to turn others against you. That's happened to me. If they do, what have you lost? They would never have been your true friend if you had to hide your views to keep them. Same goes for anyone who that person tells and also cuts you off. You'll save yourself a lot of time and emotional effort by letting those people weed themselves out from the beginning. In the end you will find yourself with friends, even if it's only a few, who accept you for who you are and make you feel safe and loved. I hope that happens for you. So many adults talk about how hard it is to make friends, to reach out and be vulnerable to rejection. It's not just a pedo thing.

If anyone asks if you are pedophile (almost no one will) then it's up to you whether that person has earned your trust enough for that information. If not, tell them that you wouldn't feel safe self-identifying if you were and why. They can speculate all they want about your sexuality. Don't worry about it.

And yes, I have close adult friends I've had since they were kids and they knew my feelings and views and never hated me for it even if they don't entirely agree. I had a crush on one of my best friends when she was 8 and I was in my 20's. I told her when she was a teenager how I felt and how long I felt it and she thought it was sweet. She just had me over for her 24th birthday.

Respect, kindness and friendship have incredible power to overcome fear and hate. Check out this video about a black man who befriended a kkk leader until he quit the clan.







• ( https link ) Why I, as a black man, attend KKK rallies. | Daryl Davis | TEDxNaperville
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