"A very common story is the girl who has sex believing the man has made a long-term monogamous commitment to her, but she finds he hasn't -- and she finds this extremely painful emotionally."

This is also true for adult wimminz and menz.

And yet, in our cult of the magical natal anniversary number, those above 21 18 16 whatever are expected to "tough it out" and those below are expected to be denied all agency for fear that they may come to regret something decades later.

I have news for you.

Nobody can ever "consent" to the sex being had with them by another. There is no world in which they can get inside the mind of anyone else. ( And some would argue that they can't even truly know their own motives. ) At best all we can do is consent to the sex that WE are having, even if we can't know why the other consents or what they get out of it.

Now we do have laws concerning fraud and breach of promise. And I for one am not comfortable telling the 16 year old that he has no rights to avail himself unless his "owners" ( parents or State ) argree to act in his stead. I'm even LESS comfortable telling him that he has no rights to deny that an offense occurred when his owners disagree with him.

But in more cases than not, the betrayal is not based upon a formal agreement, but an understanding about states of mind.

*Ahem*

I lost my virginity at a somewhat post AOC age to an adult woman.

It was somewhat fun. But I figured that, like anything else, it would improve with the learning curve.

Unfortunately, it turned out to be a one-night-stand.

I had assumed that I was beginning a sexual relationship. I found out after the fact that she was a "collector" of male virginities, and uninterested with the guy after defloration.

In hindsight I was disappointed, although at the time I was flattered.

Its common, but its not worth enslaving any class of human beings to prevent.

All choice involves the risk of disappointment.

( Heck, I could tell you the story of my first date....... )

But again, our notions about consent are derived from assumptions about an understanding of others that we are not just merely uninformed about; but which we cannot acquire because we aren't telepaths.

Maybe its time to leave telepathy to the authors of science fiction and come up with standards of agency that a human can use.

Dante