Hi

I'm hesitant to reply to your post as I am usually flamed for my views. However, even though I am male and not exactly youthful I hope my comments might be useful.

It strikes me that fantasies thrive in the absence of real concrete experience and that violent fantasies mostly will have an origin from a felt anger or resentment of some kind originating in past events. That these feelings can also be projected onto those we are attracted to I am not qualified to deal with but I do know that real experiences often have a way of dissolving these feelings and especially when the source of the anger is dealt with too. I am sure that anger has played a role in my life but it was never directed towards those I was attracted to.

In the past I have had many fantasies concerning young girls but fortunately none were of the violent or sadistic variety. I found that mostly these have disappeared over the years as I have had to understand and resolve various traumatic events in my life and a period of profound depression. Real-life relationships also helped to establish much more empathy with others which now precludes me from acting towards them - especially children - in a way that might be harmful. Knowing how real children behave in various circumstances tends to make the fantasies less viable. Another issue with fantasies is that there is a tendency for escalation like many other habits or obsessions - the tail wagging the dog - and thus are mostly unproductive and to be avoided I think.

If you have read GC for some time you will know I am not exactly an ardent supporter of pedophilia although I fully understand why many are attracted to young girls and I know that this doesn't necessarily cause too many problems for many. As has been pointed out, seeking professional help in many countries is not advisable since they are obliged to report such instances. Writing about events from your past can help I have found and places them in some sort of perspective - in private that is. It is often surprising how seemingly innocuous events often lead to intense feelings when remembered and which can be the basis for future fantasies or behaviours. The first sexual experiences are often quite traumatic for many whilst for others the experiences might pass almost unnoticed and have little impact on their later sexual attitudes or behaviour.

Moth