I miss the days when I lived in large city and we (Child Lovers of both boys and girls) would get together for dinners, movies, even an all-day beach party. Some would bring their children or YFs. We all got along, Boy Lovers and Girl Lovers, for the most part. There were times when we'd sit around an apartment and have discussions--yes, real people face-to-face having real conversations. Amazing isn't it? Yes, there were disagreements at times, but we respected each other.

I still keep in contact with some of the Child Lovers from the past. One even moved near me where I am now. He is a good friend.

There was about a year (thinking of recent posts here about RAKs) when I took in a Boy Lover and we shared a place. Oh my, that was a roller coaster ride year. We had so many shared interests and would get together with other Child Lovers at times, particularly at the beach. But then we'd have our arguments and disagreements, sometimes heated. I admit I am not the easiest person to live with, and he made some foolish (imho) mistakes in the neighborhood--nothing illegal. He is dead now and, despite our disagreements, I miss him.

I would do that (share my life with another Child Lover) again. I wish I could.

I would have a lot more movies and dinners and beach parties and what not with fellow Child Lovers, if I could. They are so rare today and are mostly limited to an occasional movie or a meal with the few I still see now and then.

We proved that Boy Lovers and Girl Lovers in real life can, and do, get along.

Have I had my disappointments? Oh, yes. I was invited once to join an organization just forming, consisting of Child Lovers and supporters, but was later asked to leave because of some of my past mistakes. I thought that highly unfair; society gives me enough crap, and I did not need ostracism from those whom I supported. I was good enough that they took some money from me (later paid back), but apparently not good enough to be a part of their organization. That still irritates me today.

There are things I would change about my life over the years. But I would never change the wonderful opportunities to share real-life experiences with fellow Child Lovers, not even the occasional disagreements. I miss, and want, those real-life experiences again.

Unfortunately, life has not been kind to me, and I have made some seriously stupid mistakes, and today I am dirt poor, struggling to survive.

Still, someday I would like to have, and see all Child Lovers have, real-life experiences and a life where we meet and greet daily and often.

Here is a partial (it is still growing) list of nicks (some of whom I do already know in real life--thanks friends) I someday hope to go to a beach party with:

Dissident - Eagle - Harbor Boy - Cubby - Hyacinth - Kabouter - Shrink Wrap - Etenne - Dante - Kevin Brown - Andrew BL - Peanuts - Butch - Joey Bishop - Aeschines. Then there is the big guy who gave great big bear hugs, crushing hugs; I miss those. And the nick that I think was Minstrel.