I never thought of it in the way of myself attempting to live out a fantasy which I think I might be doing. What I truely want would be to have her love me. Something similar to Mes' story with S. But with this I can only predict it leading to more frustration with not being able to express it back. And even said frustration would be happening in an ideal situation. Every direction I think, I hit a brick wall.

As we all know, things of this nature can only really happen in a world where adult-minor romantic/erotic relationships can go unjudged. Gladly and aside from GC, I have a very understanding best friend who I've been able to talk about this with, sometimes all through the night. Without him and this board to get my thoughts straight, I'd probably be tossed in the loony bin for what all the thinking does to me.

Finding a candidate within my own circle of family and friends could prove difficult because it doesn't leave much. I've only ever really interacted with one LG that being a friends niece which was nice. She gave me little flowers and would jump on me to wake me up if I was asleep. I'm fond of her as well, but I think that everyone would take notice if I wasn't careful as this friends family is practically an extention of mine.

I think I'll just let my heart and mind take the controls and hope that they don't get into too many fights. I'll let you all know if anything comes about with K and I. It may be a while.

Thanks much, guys.