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Yosemite Park Fires Claim Their First Victim

Posted by Eeyore on Monday, July 11 2022 at 03:16:47AM

Friends say his many decades of squatting and adament longstanding land claims against the park service, while logically hopeless, were both legendary and inspiring.

A friend who refused to be identified sighed briefly then lamented, "To be honest, I suppose the whole thing with the woke mob takin' away his six-shooters a while ago was just the last straw for him, sorta like takin' his dignity and whatnot. Why do that? He never killed nobody. A few decades ago he was a big star, bigger than Texas, even if he reckoned fame to be a superficial thing to cling to. Well... last time I saw him two days ago? I mean when the flames were poppin up on that ridge over yonder, he just started walkin' straight towards 'em. I asked him, said where ya goin'? Man just looked back at me all dejected and serious-like. Said, 'I'm gonna do what a man's gotta do. I'm a goin' back to my cabin.' Last I saw of him."

Quipped one old-timer, "I mean, gadzooks! He was small in stature, but boy howdy, what a giant of a man. Whenever we'd remind him the US Civil War ended over 150 years ago, he'd just look us dead in the eye. His mustache would quiver and he'd snap back, 'I'm no clock-watcher!'" Taking off his hat, he continued, "Well, may his tortured soul finally rest easy anyhow."

According to another,

• ( https link ) "He was also a good draw."

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