How often do you fall in love with girls you see in public? It seems to happen a lot with me. There is this one girl who comes into my store, her name is Bridgette, and one look at her and my heart flutters as if it just grew butterfly wings. She is about 8 or 9 years old with dark almond hair and matching eyes and the perfect prepubscent body. She is always so nice to me whenever I am lucky enough to see her.
But what makes me sad is knowing she'll never be anything more than a customer who I see a couple times a month for a brief period and that's if I'm lucky. What I wouldn't give to spend a full day with her at an amusement park or mall or anywhere. I want more. This frustration that comes from feeling pinned to isolation is what drives me crazy sometimes. It makes me want to act out in ways I probably shouldn't.
I mean I've been lucky enough to have nieces and met girls through family that I was able to enjoy the company of. But then I face periods of drought where my frustration grows.
And fuck anyone who says pedophilia is evil and wrong. You're all gay.