I'm fairly certain he's being satirical,

That was my understanding; if I wanted to use irony to mock the most ignorant and irrational aspects of humanity, I would write something to this effect.

I think his intention was to show us exactly how not to think, as girl-lovers, by doing an impression of the selfish, dominating and sex-depraved lunatic many of us endlessly try to distance ourselves from. I, for one, do not seek power over children, in fact the absolute contrary, I seek to EMPOWER CHILDREN, philosophically and sexually, in order to think critically and question adult dominance and prevailing societal norms.

Only a predator sees children as meat at a banquet - a true child-molester. These types of people have no right to the term 'girl-lover'. As Leucosticte has demonstrated, it is all about 'power', 'strength' and 'dominance' with them, and thus they cannot be considered child-lovers (pedophiles) by definition.

Great satire, Leucosticte!

-Human-