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Life is not accomplishing

Posted by griffith on 2020-May-05 01:50:18 EDT, Tuesday

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I happened to read small news article, because its title was "Something good about the moderate depression".

A woman with a moderate depression had learned that life is not accomplishing.

I the last few years I have often told how important self-discipline and accomplishing are when you get older -- and I have been somewhat depressed for a long time.

That thought "life is not accomplishing" was extremely welcome and relieving to me. I remembered the old days when I woke up and did not have that burden in my mind, the thought: today I must again do that and that and that, and I simply have no strength for it. Then, in the old days, I just woke up and spent a lazy day and did what I felt like doing.

I am not sure if the word accomplish is correct here -- I don't mean achieving or carrying out, getting results, I simply mean doing one's duty.

And so? No, I cannot abandon my daily duties just like that. I must still take my almost daily walk, because if I stop at this age, my health will soon deteriorate and I will die earlier. And I must keep my apartment clean, because... yes, once, about 20 years ago, I stopped cleaning for 4 years and thought: if the fucking shit apartment does not become clean by itself, I give up and let it be. And in the end a cleaning company was needed to tidy it up! After that I learned to keep my place moderately tidy.

And some thinking work... I still need to do it, but even if it often frustrates and even depresses me (when there are no results), it is something I want to do, so it is not that hard.

And some other little things... I still have to do them.

But the most important thing is the attitude. Now, if I feel stressed and pissed off, I say to myself: life is not accomplishing, you have a permission to return to your older, lazy days -- to some extent.

And now I post this with all its grammatical errors.

(That woman has not got rid of her depressive feelings, nor have I, but the attitude makes my life easier.)



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