I've written about this before but I'll repost the retelling:

I was tried and convicted for my crimes against society. (Not against my little lover.) The judge wasn't really all that interested in my case nor the proceedings because it was pretty much open and shut with nobody objecting to anything, including me. I thought, at one point, the judge was asleep.

The conviction was handed down and sentencing was scheduled for a later date. When that date arrived, the same crew and I gathered before the sleepy judge who asked me if I had anything to say before sentencing. I shook my head. He began reading about me being convicted of this, and convicted of that, and convicted of other things. Then he began listing all the times for each conviction... still just idly reciting it all from his list. "10 years" for this count, "10 years" for that count, etc. The next court case, apparently, was a more newsworthy thing than mine and several of the local news media began coming in. The judge took note of this. His demeanor changed, his voice changed, and he actually sat up to continue.

He growled, "10 years" for this, "10 years" for that, "20" years for whatever, "life" for this, and another "life" for that.. to be served concurrently. With a slam of the hammer, he made his pronouncement and I went on to the State Prison that everyone loved so much. I knew what "concurrent" meant, having researched it all beforehand. But it sure begged the question, "10 years plus 10 years, plus... plus... plus... to be served concurrently?" Why not just say, "5 years plus 5 years, plus... plus... plus" and leave the math at that? What the hell was "concurrently" for? Appearances. Pure and simple. The judge already had it all in a list, recalculated and totaled. He knew, to the day, when I would be finished with the prison system. That's why he was bored reading it all until.... the news media showed up. They never heard a word from me except "guilty". No explanations. Nothing. They never heard a word from my little lover. She was never there. They never reported on who She was, how She felt, nothing. Just the violations of Society's laws.

What I am about to add here is from the back side scan of a photo of my little lover that She sent me about 2 years after I was in prison.

Hi Dad!
These are all for you. (81 "X's" and 72 "O's" arranged in a block.) All for the most wonderful and loveble dad on earth (excluding lawyers - and all other dads exept the one related to me!)

♡

A heart was drawn with Her name written inside it and my pet name for Her in parentheses below that. There are two misspelled words that I copied just as she had spelled them.

Nevertheless, after the lengthy stay in the State's hotel for criminality, I returned to my home country Canada, things went back to normal and I got back into one of my passions. And I think to myself,

I see skies of blue
And clouds of white
The bright blessed day
The dark sacred night
And I think to myself
What a wonderful world


You never get tired of seeing it. Never.

And, yes, I miss Her terribly. For decades, Her and everything about Her, have been burning in my mind.