Oh, I agree that we're human.

I'm just not as much of a misanthrope as you are.

Or maybe I'm just more of a realist than you are. It's all how you spin it, huh?

While the fundamental assessment of Heteros as irretrievably messed up is pretty common among many online Pedos, I just don't share it.

The thing of it is, I am different from them in two respects: a) I don't think MAPs are better than them, and b) I think almost everyone is pretty much doomed to fail in some big ways relationship-wise. Maybe 5% of humanity manages to get past their issues and make a relationship work long-term; everyone else will fuck it up, and a lot of times it happens before they understand what's happening and only become aware of how it could've been fixed once it's too late.

And I just don't see misanthropic assumptions evinced in my RL community. Most of the couples I know of seem to be doing pretty darn well. While abusive relationships occur too often they don't seem to be humanity's default or even that common.

Lucky you. And I'm not just talking about outright abusive relationships. Those are but a fraction of the myriad ways in which relationships can go wrong, obviously. I don't suppose that, for example, your relationships went sour because of abuse. But it doesn't mean no one involved in those relationships ever hurt each other (emotionally). Hell, in most cases just one person falling out of love with the other one is enough to cause the second party distress, and certainly ending that relationship is going to hurt. Am I off base here?

We are agreed in principle that Pedo exceptionalism is stupid. But not about what it means to be as good as the average human being.

Bingo.

Meanwhile Ethan argues that we are worse than the average human. That we have propensities to abuse that they don't.

I'm not going to answer for Ethan or what he believes.