Heterosexual insecurity.

Y'know? A funny thing happened on the way to the forum the other day (that HAS to be the most overused line since the invention of internet message fora), and it got me thinking...

Basically, I'm sitting here, minding my own business. A lot of people are really, really drunk, some are not, and I happen to be either friends or friendly accquaintances with all of them, except one guy's new girlfriend...

The kids, of course, are indoors, because some of the adults are drunk.

Well... it just so happens that one of the, erm, drunker adults decides to go off on that ill-fated criminal enterprise, ended by suit, known as "to catch a predator." Yay. So, I'm listening, and I'm listening, and I'm seeing where this is going, and after about thirty seconds, I decide that I am becoming less and less certain about where this is going...

Suffice to say, it is, in fact, possible to throw up "GL" on your hands.

The mostly-damu 'round the table didn't say shit, or even raise their head. What the fuck were they going to say - "duh, we know?" Right. Pretty boring, 'n that's how they took it. Not worth interest.

Homeboy, otoh, glanced over, glanced down quickly, and immediately totally forgot what he was saying. And announced that fact...

After a second, he reconsidered our previous relationship, my general temperment, proceeded to give me "much love," and much of it - one thing I really, really like about gang members, ex-gang members, and people who spent a lot of time running around with gang members (for those who are curious, I think he's X3, but never bothered to ask. Me, I believe in rainbows and will run around with anybody...)... is that they're really, really good at rapidly reassuring someone that they do not, in fact, have any intention of trying to kill them for their nation. Apparently, such risks and drama are as present and as preoccupying in the average gang member's life as it is in, well, our queer little life... and, well... proceedes to continue with the story, only with some of the more borderline parts missing.

Which was fine with me.

The next time I saw him, otoh, a day or two later, he'd apparently reconsidered again, and made "I'm straight" his favorite phrase. In, mind you, a variety of flagrancy and obsequeousness which I would never engage in - outside my closet, which is faggy as fuck. And kept doing this. All day.

By the next day, he'd apparently reassured himself that I do not, in fact, stab heterosexuals unless I, I dunno, kinda feel like it, lol... and he stopped. I also avoided telling him that this word does not mean what he thinks it means, and comes in fact from our knowledge, not his, but hey... he doesn't need to know. But... yes, he stopped doing it after he reassured himself, apparently.

'n that's the odd thing. Practically fucking everyone, upon finding out the "there is diversity" version of "you are not alone" (lol) has, apparently, felt a great need to dance around and posture in ways which are frankly rediculous, even - or especially - from the purpouses of work or a job assignment. Including some charming mistakes - directed intimidation, for instance - which frankly amount to "you would get killed in the big city, but I am wiser than that" in their summary.

Heterosexual insecurity. It exists, and in the most outrageous and extreme of forms.

I have no immediately-logical idea why. I have a fairly minimalist, low-key drama management style, to which this is, well, basically nonproportional. Hell, considering the point at which I bother versus the minimalism I use, "gratitude at my belief in mercy" would be a more appropriate response than one-sided monkey-gesturing without a second participant... prima facie, at least.

Heterosexual insecurity. It's out there...

...'n that recurrent, yet inexplicable on its face, theme brought to mind one historical critique. One theory as to why confederate slavery continued long after it was no longer economically viable is that white southerners were afraid that, if not occupied and terrorized by the institution of slavery, would immediately engage in, well, sort of an ex-slave rebellion, a wave of (probably just) antiwhite reprisal...

Could this historical model provide a more rational framework for the otherwise-inexplicable heterosexual insecurity when confronted - gently - with the possibility that they are not alone??

If so, it would mean a lot of things... the first being that there is an originally quasirational source for this bizzare behavior, and the second, that we'll probably have to continue to deal with this shit... it also, though, suggests... the presense of guilt, that our primary obstacle is fear based from figuring out what a logical backlash from what the guilt describes might be, that - paradoxically - history tells us that atrocity will increase as guilt over past atrocities increases... and, well... that these people haven't really thought this through much, as it doesn't take a tactical genius to figure out that "quit incurring cost" is the winning strategy to such situation...

...but at the end of the day, "fear of underclass revolt" - while the established source for the brutality of everything from rome to the aztec empire to the confederate institution - is just a theory. Heterosexual insecurity, complete with goofy water-testing and comic pseudobravado, is the observed reality...

...any ideas? Insights? Applications? 'cause at the end of the day, the one thing I can promise you, is that heterosexual insecurity is very much out there, and a chronic reaction...

...any ideas? Experiences? Thoughts? Discuss...