The grass is always greener...

... particularly if she has grass on her landing strip.

But of course its not that easy.

Either you're attracted, or you're not. Adding more partner options by looking for guys at gay hangouts just isn't an option for me. Would that constitute "living partly unhappy?" Well, if another's happiness wouldn't be a pleasure for you, then its not like you're missing out because you aren't interested in all the options on the menu.

And if you are interested in adults, that doesn't guarantee happiness or "success."

I was in a long-term relationship for over a decade. But my dry-spells between relationships are 4-5 years long; and that was back when I was young and thin.

At this point I can't see getting seriously involved with someone if I had to hide this part of my life from them. But that's really up to her, not to me. If I determined that the person I was interested in didn't appreciate all of me, then I'd have to bail.

Then again, post-divorce I can't see a whole lot of difference with the non-GLer aspects of my life. I spent the latter half of my marriage back-pedaling away from sharing the unappreciated aspects of my life. I left the stupid puns and the love of analytic debate back in the workplace where my co-workers appreciated those sides of my nature. Eventually the whole thing collapsed due to lack of communication; no duh? Being a GLer is just one more thing which is non-negotiable.

On the other hand, I'm not worried about jealousy. Any adult woman who knows I'm attracted to adult women has to deal with the fact that I'm attracted to more than just her. Its not like the blinders go on the moment I have a partner.

But none of my adult GFs or my wife ever had anything to be jealous about. I'm not the straying kind. And so long as I don't select insecure women, this shouldn't be an issue.

Dante